Seeing the wrong words

It's weird and amusing how, when I read fast, my brain sometimes sees the wrong words.

I just read the sentence, "Think of it as a convenient, but shorter term solution (much like leasing a car)."

My brain saw "(much like teasing a cat)". That is a much funnier sentence. I laughed.

For your Friday amusement

From a CNN story:

A 21-year-old German tourist who wanted to visit his girlfriend in the Australian metropolis Sydney landed 13,000 kilometers (8,077 miles) away near Sidney, Montana, after mistyping his destination on a flight booking Web site.

According to a press release from an alliance of government scientists:

Grand Canyon National Park is not permitted to give an official estimate of the geologic age of its principal feature, due to pressure from Bush administration appointees. Despite promising a prompt review of its approval for a book claiming the Grand Canyon was created by Noah's flood rather than by geologic forces, more than three years later no review has ever been done and the book remains on sale at the park, according to documents released today by Public Employees for Environmental Responsibility (PEER).

That's funny.

On the Ohio smoking ban

Ohio recently passed a ban on smoking inside public places statewide. Bars, restaurants, bowling alleys... no smoking, please. You can still smoke in your own home, your own car, and outdoors.

[20:35] Chris C: the smoking ban, for instance. that was completely unconstitutional
[20:36] Bill: I'm not a fan of your cancer sticks, so I'll leave that issue aside.
[20:36] Chris C: i'm not a fan of car exhaust. i'm not a fan of the chemical plant right down the road from me.
[20:37] Bill: me either.
[20:38] Chris C: they're also telling owners how to run their businesses.
[20:41] Bill: i don't think i could ever be convinced of a connection between civil rights and smoking in enclosed public spaces.
[20:41] Chris C: well, you're not a smoker. but a fraction of the population chooses to be
[20:42] Chris C: and a fraction of businesses in the united states chooses to have a smoking section to accommodate those who do smoke
[20:57] Bill: The problem here is that people are having trouble visualizing the harm because it isn't immediate. We're all about blood and gore. There is insurmountable evidence of the danger of second hand smoke, and how sitting in a bar is like smoking x number of cigarettes / packs. About how often non-smoking family members get lung cancer *before* the smokers.
[20:58] Bill: It's like drunk driving. No one is against banning that. The harm is clear and immediate. You are allowed to drink. You are not allowed to drink and drive, because you will eventually hurt other people.
[20:58] Bill: And individual businesses don't have the right to permit it.
[20:58] Bill: Kroger cant be like, "Hell, you're allowed to drink and drive in our parking lot."
[20:58] Bill: "It's our god damned parking lot."
[20:58] Bill: "And we want to cater to those who have an activity they like to do that will harm other people."
[20:58] Chris C: hahaha
[20:59] Bill: "Go shop somewhere that doesn't let you drive drunk in the lot. Screw you!"
[20:59] Chris C: the population has to die off somehow.

Kroger is badass like that.

But seriously, what do you think about it?

Notes on life

1. It should be illegal to make the commercials obscenely louder than the tv program.
2. Sweet and sour chicken isn't sour at all. And it's the sauce that is sour, not the chicken. We need to have a dialog with the restaurant people about this issue.
3. Denzel Washington is always really angry in movies and shoots people a lot. I think he could benefit from an outlet like fingerpainting. Eric suggests interpretive dance.

I don't like studying.

I don't like studying., originally uploaded by Billy V.

The sun is up now. I went to go dig my ipod out of the car, and discovered that it had rained. It seems so fresh outside.

I went to get Steak n Shake earlier / last night, and ate it at the firehouse while I studied for an exam today. I spilled my cherry coke, and was sad. I'd only managed a couple sips of it before I fumbled. Oh how I wanted that Cherry Coke, and instead I had to watch it slowly soak into the carpet.

I just read a lot, and watched bits of a movie to reward myself. Now I shall sleep for a few hours, and read more when I wake up.

That is all.

[Exam at 2:45. I don't like school.]

Wireless AMBER alerts

This seemed important enough to share with people. You can get free amber alerts on your cell phone, specific to your area, by visiting wirelessamberalerts.org.

For the unfamiliar, the wikipedia article tells us: "In the United States and Canada, an AMBER Alert is a notification to the general public, by various media outlets, of a confirmed child abduction. AMBER is a backronym for "America's Missing: Broadcast Emergency Response", and was named for 9-year-old Amber Hagerman who was abducted and murdered in Arlington, Texas in 1996."

They say that the first few hours are the most critical in cases of a child abduction where there is a risk of harm, and amber alerts are issued as quickly as possible to get the word out on what to look for.

Hey, it's free. And if you happen to save a kid or something, I'll buy you an ice cream cone.

- Bill

You know what really grinds my gears?

So I bought a new bottle of shampoo recently, and used it for the first time. I'm in the shower, wasting hot water, and I pick up the bottle to read the instructions. Yes, I was actually reading the instructions.

We all might wonder why instructions are even necessary on a shampoo bottle. It's always the same thing. Yet I check every time I get a new one, just in case, because you never know when it is going to be something radically different. "Mix three tablespoons of shampoo in a wooden bowl with one teaspoon of chocolate syrup and apply with steel wool," it might say. But no, the directions were pretty standard.

And then, the next paragraph.

"This product was not tested on animals."

WHAT?! I threw the bottle down in horror. Not tested on animals? How on earth do they know its safe for me, then?

This is ridiculous. I demand that all my products first be tested on animals.